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| "What do you want from me?" |
NY went into the half tied with Tennessee at 10. The score made it seem like a balanced game but it wasn't. The Giants held the ball for almost 3/4 of the half and couldn't convert TDs in the redzone. The Giant defense did a good job on Chris Johnson but the offense was a circus of mistakes. I'd like to know why there is so many tips by WRs who make a fortune to catch passes. I'd like to know why Bradshaw carries the ball like he's a QB. Walter Payton used to run with the ball unprotected but he didn't put it on the ground like Bradshaw did on the goal line. Pop Warner mistakes that would make Bear Bryant rise from his grave to eat a baby.
Another missed opportunity occurred within the 10. Eli drops back to pass, there's nothing there so he runs. When Eli is 3 yards shy of a TD he decides to toss a left handed pass that was picked off . What? You can't write a worse outcome. Why not run for it? I nearly sh%# my sofa.
Lawrence Tynes has proven that he's useless beyond 40 yards. Utterly useless. He was 1 for 3, leaving 6 on the field. At one point, NY lined up to kick a field goal only to be flagged for a delay of game. Thanks Matt Dodge, add this to the list of things you can't do. But don't blame him, kicking tees can't tell time either. Back it up five and of course Tynes missed that one too. This is where I finally sh%# the sofa. Maybe he should start attempting kicks with his other foot, blind folded and under the influence of meth. By no means would you ever make the mistake of calling him automatic. He's like a rifle that shoots blanks. He is as useful to the Giants as a eunuch is to a sperm bank.
Kareem McKenzie, (me clapping sarcastically). You go big girl! Two personal fouls and both were right in front of a ref. Are you kidding me? No No, I mean how do you throw down an opposing player, with the game on line and everyone is watching? That's like robbing a bank in the presence of the NYPD or trying to hug the president. Yank him for good, I'd rather see what Andrews can do.
Oh and can't forget about everyone's favorite tip-toe, east-west running, standing straight up in the air running back who skips for a loss like he was on the f#%@&*# yellow! brick! road! The Cowardly Jacobs. In his best imitation of Jeremy Shockey, Jacobs the spruce goose grabs a nice gain and then goes into an epileptic seizure, kicking and fighting only to draw flags. Well done dummy. You said you had something to prove this week and you did. Helmets aren't just for football, keep yours on while you ride the short bus all the way to the trade deadline. At this point I'd deal him to Green Bay for a cheese wheel or San Diego for a glass of sea water. If he was on the way to OZ, he'd have to ask the wizard for a heart, courage, a brain and those little red shoes that are to die for! Wait, can he ask the wonderful wizard for balls? He needs them too.
Believe it or not, I feel bad for Tom Coughlin. He has lost total control here. I'm not sure that he can regain it. This team is a mess. When he came out before the game, sporting his trademark red face, I knew then it was over. Tom can scream and shout all he wants but I believe this team lacks all semblance of discipline. Unfortunately you can't teach common sense, that's a fact of life. How do you grab a player and say, "Kareem don't throw a guy on the ground in front of the ref, please". Hey Antrel Rolle, "Don't smack a guy in the face, you'll get called for 15". "Bradshaw, tuck the ball in when running." Aren't these obvious things? Hey Brandon,"fire is hot, no touch." I guess sometimes with children, you have to pat them on the head and just say to yourself, "Hey, I did the best I could, so what if he eats his own Lego's." Final score Titans 29 Smalls 10.
(Deep breath) I guess if I were asked to describe this version of the NY Giants in two words or less, it would be... Awesomely Awful
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